This past weekend was the Sussex Fall Conference, and though I’ve made the trip before, each time carries its own rhythm, different faces, familiar roads, and the same gentle reminder that fellowship and faith can recharge a weary spirit in ways no solitary effort can.

Justin, Jared, and I started off early Saturday morning, driving through a landscape wrapped in a faint gold light, road rolling out in front of us. We missed the first speaker (we were cutting it close from the start), but the drive itself made up for it, quiet stretches of countryside and that particular New Brunswick light that makes even pasture fences feel like a painting. There’s something about long drives to a place of worship that feels right, almost like a small pilgrimage of its own.

The next portion of the story brings Christian and Pliable to one of the most memorable places in the book—the Slough of Despond, or as it’s often called, the swamp of discouragement.

Depression is a real struggle, and yes, I’ll say it plainly: depression is a bitch. Sorry for the moderate language, but honestly, it feels appropriate. It sneaks up on me, sometimes out of nowhere, sometimes triggered by something small, and sometimes by nothing I can even name. While I’ve never been formally diagnosed, I’ve lived with this on-again, off-again cycle long enough, done the research, and felt the weight of it enough to know what it is: depression.

The strange part is that simply knowing it’s depression doesn’t make it any easier to manage. Knowledge isn’t a cure. If it were, things would be much simpler. Sometimes the heaviness passes quickly, like a passing cloud, while other times it drags on for days. And, unfortunately, sometimes it lasts far longer than I would like to admit.

As the story continues, we’re introduced to two neighbours who chase after Christian, men who reveal very different hearts when confronted with the call to leave the City of Destruction.

I’ve begun the journey through Pilgrim’s Progress, and the first chapter wastes no time in laying a foundation. It’s sobering, but also powerful.

I know many have already read The Pilgrim’s Progress. My own copy came from Timmy, though to be honest I never got past the first chapter until now.

While biking I’ve been catching up on the Practicology Podcast, and a few years back they did several episodes working through the book. That was the final push I needed to finally sit down and read it properly.

This past Sunday I spoke at the Willows: Just a short 10–15 minute Gospel message. It went… okay. I managed to get my main point across, though I didn’t feel like I delivered it as well as I could have. Others told me it came across fine, which I’m grateful for, but speaking has never been my strong suit. I rely heavily on my writing, and what works on paper doesn’t always flow the same way when spoken aloud. Still, by God’s grace the message was given, and that’s what matters most.

“And Jesus said unto him, Verily I say unto thee, To day shalt thou be with me in paradise.” -Luke 23:43 KJV

Meanwhile, I’ve continued the process of tidying up my GitHub account. It’s something that had been long overdue. A pile of half-finished projects, old forks, and forgotten experiments were cluttering things up. Now, most of it is cleaned up, archived, or reorganized. The surprising thing is how this cleanup rekindled the itch to code again. I’ve started working on a handful of small repositories, nothing groundbreaking, just little side projects or ideas that amused me. Will any of them ever be “finished”? Probably not. But for me, it’s less about the end product and more about keeping my brain moving and practising what little coding knowledge I have.

Every now and then I hit that point where the digital clutter builds up too much and it needs a proper cleaning. This past week I finally turned my attention to GitHub, which I’ve been neglecting for years. It’s been a graveyard of old forks, abandoned projects, and random experiments that no longer served any purpose.

So, I took the plunge: deleted what wasn’t worth keeping, archived the projects that were finished but still had some value, and updated what might still have a future. It felt good to pare things back to what actually matters.

I recently finished reading Why I Am Not Reformed by Matthew Cain, a short but direct little book that does exactly what the title suggests. Cain takes the time to lay out why he cannot align himself with the Reformed system, even while appreciating the good that came out of the Protestant Reformation.

It feels like I start every update the same way, by admitting that I’ve let too much time slip by. Maybe I should set myself a reminder that tells me to write even when I feel I have nothing of value to share. At least then I’d be forming the habit of putting words down instead of letting things drift.

Much has happened since the last post, though I’m sure I’ve already forgotten half of it. My attention has shifted from this site to building the Gospel site at gospel.fromgravelhill.ca. Progress is slow, but it’s moving along. Digging through the old site’s tangled folders to pull out audio and articles is not quick work, but it needs to be done, and I feel called to do it.